Words that mean something totally different when you’re single vs. in a relationship

 

Mom:

What it means when you’re single: The person who most frequently asks “Have you met anyone yet?”

mom

What it means in a relationship: “When will you become one?” The question that every person who knows about your relationship will ask.

Shaving:

What it means when you’re single: Something that you no longer do, because who cares?

shaving2

What it means in a relationship: The act of removing your hair so that you look more desirable to your S.O. and so that he doesn’t suspect that you’re a real human being with hair.

Married:

What it means when you’re single: Day dreams of celebs you wish to marry.

marriage

What it means in a relationship: A derogatory way your friends refer to you and your boo.

Brunch:

What it means when you’re single: A group of girls getting together to drink unlimited amounts of mimosas and/or Bloody Marys, and then stumbling into their Ubers early in the afternoon.

brunch

What it means in a relationship: Trying very hard to stay at a low buzz while making an effort to impress your S.O.’s family.

Getting Ready For a Date:

What it means when you’re single: Head to toe shaving/waxing, moisturizing, blow drying, plucking, LBD, heels, make up, the fifth circle of hell.

What it means in a relationship: Throw on the first outfit you see lying around and run out the door.

Fighting:

What it means when you’re single: An argument between you and yourself about whether or not you should order a pizza for you.

fight

What it means in a relationship: Mainly consists of arguing over a bunch of little things and bullshit, usually ends in hot make up sex.

Weekend:

What it means when you’re single: Sleeping until 4PM, and then making zero effort to move for the rest of the day, because you have no one to answer to.

ikea

What it means in a relationship: 6 hour long trips to Ikea together.

Wine:

What it means when you’re single: Your best friend.

wine

What it means in a relationship: Usually a romantic drink shared over dinner between couples.

Netflix and Chill:

What it means when you’re single: Body pillow cuddles, a bottle of wine, a pizza to the face, and whatever you feel like watching, even if you have seen it a hundred times; with no judgment.

netflix n chill

What it means in a relationship: Cuddling with your S.O. while you watch tv and movies together. Cue in lots of make out sessions and sex.

Engaged:

What it means when you’re single: Very into something. Entertained. Enthralled.

engaged

What it means in a relationship: Something you, your friends, and family are all waiting for you to be.

Valentine’s Day:

What it means when you’re single: Getting very excited for February 15th; clearance on all chocolate and stuffed animals! So winning.

valentines

What it means in a relationship: Your guy will be spending lots of money on flowers, chocolate, dinner, and romance all in hope of getting laid.. and maybe trying something new.

Club:

What it means when you’re single: Loud but great music. Dressing in slutty clothing with lots of cleavage in hopes of getting free drinks from some grimy dude on the dance floor, then laughing about it with your crew.

club

What it means in a relationship: Book club? Country club? Golf club?

Single:

What it means when you’re single: Crying about Forever Alone, or living your life the way you want when you want!

single

What it means in a relationship: “Babe, do you have an singles in your wallet? I’m a dollar short”